My mind is a dangerous place. Make sure you wear a cup.

Monday, January 02, 2006

Bad Habits

I was thinking the other day about bad habits. Specifically, I was thinking about it after a trip to the grocery store. You see, I am not one of those people who always make sure they return the shopping cart to its rightful place, be that a corral or back into the store. I just don't have that kind of time. I'm a busy man.

I have a friend who considers that to be a bad habit. Well, if the corral is right there, I put it away, but

So, if that's a bad habit, what other bad habits do I have?

Well, something else I do that I know annoys some people is I'll spit gum out of the car. And yet, if I happen to be in a parking lot and I step on gum that someone else has spit out, I'm livid. Which should, to some extent, convey to you the hypocritical nature of my existence.

I always wear my seatbelt, but for some reason, I take it off when I turn into my subdivision, even though my house is almost a half mile in. I know it's possible I'll get into in accident during that last furlong, but I do it anyway.

I have a bad habit of interrupting people. Drives my assistant crazy. Hey, it's not my fault that I have a cluttered mind, is it? I'll have something on my mind and she'll come in to ask me a question and before she can, I've asked her a question, and then we get off on a tangent, and then perhaps even another tangent, and before you know it, she gets a blank look on her face and has forgotten what she came in for.

I don't do it on purpose. Usually.

It's quite a talent, though.

When the dust clears, that's not really so bad, is it? I think the above habits are more than offset by the fact that I'm a good driver, I'm kind to animals, I always say "please" and "thank you", and I am a fabulous dancer.

Okay, I lied about the dancing part. I'm a liar too. I forgot to mention that.


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