My mind is a dangerous place. Make sure you wear a cup.

Friday, July 14, 2006

Let's test her theory...

On Sunday my blogging buddy Zhadi made this comment:

On a different topic, do you realize you're the blogging equivalent of Stephen King? You could post your grocery list and people would still say that you're FABulous...

By the way, Zhadi is fabulous. She lives in California and is a writer and an actress and all kinds of things. She is neat-o, as the kids would say. Well, as the kids would say in 1957.

She can also sword fight. How many people do you know can sword fight? How freaking cool is that?

Also, remember that tiger I used to have for my avatar? She knows him! His name is Caesar. How cool it that?

I digress. Again.

Oh yeah, the grocery list. Well, I thought I would test her theory out. Unfortunately this meant I needed to go through our big garbage can outside to find the receipt from when I last went grocery shopping. But I emerged triumphant, covered in ick, and here it is:

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
I spent more than I usually do last week. We got some high end cold meat, some fresh fish, and some nice cuts of meat. Plus I bought a couple of filters for the air conditioner, and I am just now realizing how much they cost. Jesus Christ, are they made out of platinum?

You'll notice dog food on there. We don't have a dog. We feed it to the raccoons.

And don't get all excited about the spinach and carrots and grapes We don't eat that healthy. That is all for our rabbits.

Look how early I go. 8 a.m. That way when Mrs. Fab gets, up the food is purchased, put away, and the menu is planned. Aren't I a great husband?

Of course, it's usually not long after that that I am awakening her in some rude fashion or another.

As you can see, Kelly was the cashier that day. I remember her as blandly pleasant. And the bag boy was very good.

You will also notice we don't use coupons. I don't have the attention span for that. Or the time. I am sure they are useful, though.

Okay, I guess that about wraps up my trip to the grocery store. Pretty riveting stuff, eh?

Have a great weekend guys! Mine is only one day long, as I have to drive to Huntsville on Sunday. More on that later.

Go nuts!


Anonymous Anonymous said...


4:39 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Really, that's all I got for this post. I just wanted to let you know that I'm still out here, watching.....

4:41 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

But the main thing is that I was first, and that's all that counts. I mean, being FIRST, and all.

4:42 AM  
Blogger Mister Gravely said...

I think we should all call the store manager, Kevin Kennedy, at (352)375-1285, and let him know what a fine job he's doing. Managers like that. We should also dial information for his home number and call him at home at 2 a.m. and let him know also. Managers don't like that, but it's fun.

4:49 AM  
Blogger Lorraine said...

Bet that list appears on ebay soon!

5:07 AM  
Blogger Mister Gravely said...

Yeah, right.

5:13 AM  
Blogger Pamela J Weatherill said...

Oh my god .... NO MANGOS!!!!!!!

5:19 AM  
Blogger Mr. Fabulous said...

Dick---Sorry you didn't get to be first. Better luck next time!

Mr. Gravely--Actually, I don't think he has a home. He always seems to be at the store. Retail, ugh!

Lorraine--Maybe on Canadian eBay...

Mr. Gravely--Exactly!

Pamela--What is the point? I wil have to retire as Mango Boy if you reject my comments LOL

(I find it funny that no one except Pamela and I know what that means!)

5:32 AM  
Blogger Leave It To Cleavage said...

Can I clone you? I have never had a great guy in my life. Hopefully, you and Mrs. Fab both know how luck you are to have each other!!

What do you feed the lemurs?

6:59 AM  
Blogger Some Girl said...

I see Ruffles Cheddar and Sour Cream potato chips on that receipt! YUM!!! are not out of the loop...check your site meter referrals

7:23 AM  
Blogger Spider Walk said...

I must confess I find it very interesting to see what other people purchase at the store. I will often times compare my lot of goods to the person who has theirs all laid out on the conveyer belt to see who eats healthier. I get all proud when I have more fruits, veggies, and healthy stuff in my cart. Im I the only one who does this?

Ok..I probably am. So call me a dork and hand over some of that Pepsi One already.

7:33 AM  
Blogger kattbanjo said...

absolutely fascinating. I cannot compete with such rapier wit as yours. I may just quit blogging completely......

7:55 AM  
Anonymous LisaBinDaCity said...

I see you everywhere - you are a riot!

LOVE your avatar by the by... what kind of cookies? ;-)

8:09 AM  
Blogger Pud said...


Wait a minute! Did I just see on that receipt that you paid with a check!?! How ancient! Who writes checks anymore. Honestly?

8:19 AM  
Blogger Janet said...

What's up with the BABY pea blend? I thought you said you had no kids? Did you lie to me!?

By the way, you're my new renter so if the baby peas end up in the freezer, I can't guarantee they'll be their tomorrow. :)

I tried to check out your "Rent My Blog" but I didn't find an ad. :(

8:38 AM  
Blogger Mr. Fabulous said...

Leave--Well..I don't know how great I am. Let's say pretty good :)

Some Girl--Ooh, a mystery! I'm on it!

Spidey--No Pepsi One here, missy! Coke Zero in this house!

Katt--Hardly. You make the rest of us look like we're all standing still, darlin'!

Lisabindacity--Homemade chocolate chip--Mrs. Fab's specialty! Thanks for coming by!

Pud--How do you pay for your groceries? They used to take it out in trade, but the other customers complained about me having sex on the belt.

Janet--No babies! No babies! If I ever get off my ass and clean the room, I have promised the next two spots to Pixie and then Revree. If you want, I will slot you in third...

8:55 AM  
Blogger Sandi said...

You is eatin' good there my friend!

I didn't see any hamburger helper or ramen noodles on there...;P

9:25 AM  
Blogger CrankyProf said...

I was expecting to see peyote, Depends and perhaps some form of lube on that list.

Damn, that's a disappointment.

9:27 AM  
Blogger Bluepaintred said...

LMAO and my only bit of sadness is that I cant see the receipt. photobucket is closed due to matienece

dick small is weird and seriously starting to creep me out!

9:36 AM  
Blogger Nobody said...

Damn, food is expensive there.

Porterhouse steak? I'll be over tonight.

9:42 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

That hurts, bluepaintred. Really.

9:48 AM  
Blogger Mark Base said...

I was glued to the screen.

Please let us know when you next visit the hardware store!

9:51 AM  
Blogger Chelle said...

You buy groceries? Hell if I send my husband to get groceries, we would end up in the poor house!! lol Of course, just GETTING him to do it is a chore in itself....

9:53 AM  
Blogger Mister Gravely said...

Do I creep you out, bluepaint? I've been known to have that effect on 'certain' individuals...

9:55 AM  
Blogger Maidink said...

Good heavens. Only you can do a post like this and get such interesting comments.

You could blog on dryer lint and it would probably end up on some "Best Blog Post Ever" blog award site.

It must be your sparkling personality, rapier wit, and the lemurs.

10:08 AM  
Blogger Finn said...

Olive loaf? Do real people eat that?

And a check? Really, get with the program. Checks are almost as passe as cash. It's about the plastic, baby.

10:21 AM  
Blogger D said...

I found it strange for the catfish purpose, only because I happen to live in the catfish capital of the world (ok, maybe just Canada) and I find it gross. Unless its Catfish cheeks.

I concur though, Dick's getting past the point of being weird.

10:22 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm hurt, guys. I really am. Well, I'll stop posting then.

10:33 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I saw catfish fillet on that receipt... Ha! Are you going to try my recommendation for the weirdest breakfast ever? And after you mocked me so...

Oh, and by the way, I think Maidink issued another challenge.

10:42 AM  
Blogger michele said...

Porterhouse steak 12.06 that's
outrageous,out here in cali
ours are like 7.00 dollars.
Is the beef better in florida?

10:50 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just read what you wrote on my Geek's site...

Dammit! I am too polite, you jackass! I'm the nicest person I know!

*tee hee*

10:54 AM  
Blogger Saur♥Kraut said...

Mmmmmmmmm! What's for dinner? Thanks for sharing. This is equivalent to peeking into someone else's windows for me. ;o)

10:54 AM  
Blogger Teri said...

I find it amazing that you only saved 89 cents for this trip. Doesn't your Publix have a "store card" where you can save some bucks?

11:02 AM  
Blogger speckledpup said...

I laid away school supplies yesterday.
I should post that....

yes, you are fabulous
yes, I will read whatever you write.
no, I'm not stimulated

and the FLUFF are you feeding raccoons?

11:12 AM  
Blogger Webmiztris said...

oh, come on! where's the embarrasing items like hemorrhoid cream and the giant tub of KY Jelly?

11:29 AM  
Blogger Shelli said...

I wasn't even going to comment on this post. It is just so boring that I may quit reading altogether. ;)

Actually, the racoons like grapes, too.

And here, we have pay by touch. Yes that is right. You put your finger print on file and it takes it out of your bank card. How progressive is that? HMmmmmm? I guess we aren't so backwards here after all, Mr. Not-so-Fabulous! Just teasing you my brother. I love you, you know.

11:45 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

you eat a lot of JUNK!
expensive JUNK at that.
don't you know there are starving children in this world?
send your money to them.

12:21 PM  
Blogger Anne R. Key said...

I just want you to know that I, too, can swordfight. Competently, even. Back in the day, before I got the arthritis, I was a bit of a swashbuckler with a swept-hilt rapier and a pair of tall leather boots up over my knees and a floppy hat with a large blue ostrich feather in the brim.

It's why I'm married today.

12:38 PM  
Anonymous Michelle said...

Yep, still fabulous. Well except for the olive loaf. Do people actually eat that.... I thought it was just there for the entertainment value.

12:47 PM  
Blogger DutchBitch said...

Be Baby Pea Blend? ummm...???

1:16 PM  
Blogger zhadi said...

Hah! I was right! My theory has been proven correct! BWAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!

Um..Can I come eat at your house? I like your grocery list. But I want some of the healthy stuff along with one of those steaks.

Thank you for the kind words, btw. And Anne. R. Key, swordfighting is how I met all the men I've ever been involved with...I'll trade you pictures of floppy boots et al!

1:33 PM  
Blogger Blogarita said...

Baby Pee Blend? Yum?

Wow! We don't spend that much in 3 weeks! Including beer.

1:36 PM  
Blogger Jen said...

olive loaf

2:04 PM  
Blogger Shannon said...

All i saw was the Hershey You shop like me, but not that early.. I agree, even your shopping list is fun to read and comment on!

Have a great weekend!

2:32 PM  
Blogger ablondeblogger said...

Zhadi was right. I LOVED this post! I actually got a calculator out because I couldn't believe that that simple list added up to that much money (it did, btw!)

I love the WW meals and Coke Zero, followed by two huge Porterhouse steaks, rofl!!!

I also thought those air fresheners seemed awfully expensive.

And when I saw how much the grapes were, I thought, "Holy shit, they eat a lot of grapes!" until I saw that you fed them to your rabbits. I didn't know rabbits could eat grapes. I'm going to start feeding them to my bunny now.

Oh, by the way, my husband's middle name is Ceasar. :)

3:25 PM  
Blogger ablondeblogger said...

Oh by the way, I say we all give the general manager a call and tell him that Mr. Fab told us to. :)

3:31 PM  
Blogger shirley said...

Blogmad - popo zao!

3:53 PM  
Blogger kari said...

Have a great weekend!!!

4:38 PM  
Blogger Shelli said...

Blogmad hit! Pass the grapes!

5:47 PM  
Blogger Dixie said...

While reading your receipt I considered that if I posted my own I may be slightly embarrassed at some of the crap that finds its way into my basket each week.

And then I remembered my receipts would be in Germany and that most of y'all couldn't read them anyway.

Or could you?

6:10 PM  
Blogger Billy said...

Just be sure to let me know when those Porterhouses hit the grill.

and I still can't believe you posted your effin grocery list. funny dude, funny.

6:11 PM  
Blogger Mr. Fabulous said...

Sandi--This was an anomaly. I usually spend about half this much.

CP--I buy my lube at Sam's Club. Volume, volume, volume!

Bluepaintred--Well, he is certainly an interesting fellow!

Bobody--It is? They were really big steaks,

Dick--Easy, big fella! :)

Mark Base--I'm going to the pet store tomorrow. How about that?

Chelle--I'll be happy to talk to him :)

Mr. Gravely--I find you to be quite engaging...

Maidink--Dryer lint, eh. Hmm....

Megan--I do :) I can trade plastic for food?

D--Oh my, fried catfish is the BEST!

Dick--Now don't be like that...

Tense Teacher--Not for breakfast! LOL. I think you might be right on the challengs...

Michele--Well, it was a big one. I guess the price per pound is the key...

Tense Teacher--Sure, for Mississippi...

Saur--You can peek in our windows too, if you want :)

Teri--Hmm...that's a good idea!

Pup--Does NOTHING stimulate you? LOL

Webmiztris--I get my K-Y on the street...

Shelli--Who are you kidding, sis? You guys up there still trade beaver skins and beads for food!

Anon--What is their address?

Anne--Maybe we should set up a challenge...

Michelle--I like to stuff some in my pockets. It's a tasty snack!

Dutchy--Best ever, baby doll!

Zhadi--Come on over anytime! You are always welcome!

Blogarita--I usually spend a fraction of that...

Jen--Oh no, you gotta try it!

Shannon--LOVE the cocoa! You have a great weekend too!

ABB--His name is Caesar? That is so cool! Hey, the air fresheners are awesome! They plug into the wall. Tropical Sunset...

Shirley--Thanks doll!

Kari--You too, buddy!

ABB--Ooh, we really should. That guy works hard!

6:38 PM  
Blogger Mr. Fabulous said...

Shelli--I like grapes! Sometimes I eat the bunny grapes :)

Dixie--Oh, I would be sure to translate it! LOL

Billy--We'll call you before they hit the grill, my friend!

6:44 PM  
Blogger Catch said...

good list Fab.....porterhouse steaks in my opinion are the best kind of steak you can buy. and I like the spinach to. But I didnt see toilet paper on you wipe? lol

6:50 PM  
Blogger Lori said...

Teddy grahms and applesauce yummy yummy.

6:54 PM  
Blogger CanadianSwiss said...

Of course you're fabulous, Mr. Fab. Where else would the name come from??

But on another note, in the classical actors' profession, you learn to sword fight. It's usually a must... And it's cool. So get YOUR sword up, too. No, Fab, not THAT one...! Going nuts, thank you! :-)

7:13 PM  
Blogger The Wrath of Dawn said...

zhadi was right!

You're not going to use the peas for the same reason as Dad Gone Mad did, are you?

And why do you buy S.O.S. pads that are specifically for scrubbing lemons? Are the lemons really that dirty in Florida?

and if leave it to cleavage figures out how to clone you, I want a copy.

7:14 PM  
Blogger Big Pissy said...

Hey! I still write checks!

7:54 PM  
Blogger cherish said...

Awesome Grocery List!!!

You are an amazing husband!! My husband does not even know where the kitchen is moreless the grocery store.

8:11 PM  
Blogger cherish said...

PS: You are FABULOUS!!!!!!!!!!

8:12 PM  
Anonymous Stefanie said...

I always thought it would be fun to be a grocery store cashier - just to see what everyone bought. (I'm weird that way.)

And... wowee, groceries sure are expensive down there in the Sunshine state. $5.99 for carrots! That better be a wheelbarrow full for that price!

Have a great weekend!

8:33 PM  
Blogger Geek said...

Im sorry, I cant come up with a single smartass comment. exept maybe that Kevin Kennedy, at (352)375-1285, was really trying to get his phone number in the Fabs hands.

I dont know, its been a long week.

8:55 PM  
Blogger Mr. Fabulous said...

Catch--We stock up at Wal-Mart for that! Need any?

Lori--Tasty, eh? ;)

CS--Oh my! Working blue? You? Hee hee.

Dawn--The lemons are FILTHY. And me, I am a very aquired taste. After about three days you would be coming after me with a meat cleaver!

Pissy--Thank you! The kids today just don't understand!

Cherish--You know, I think you are pretty fabulous too!

Stefanie--Believe me, it is a HUGE bag of carrots--five pounds! Thanks for stopping by!

Geek--A little "Bacon Makin'" will clear your head :)

9:28 PM  
Blogger karaoke queen said...

Mmmmmm fruit. Sorry I'm drooling a little because fruit here in Osaka is soooo expensive that we must eat it from a can most of the time. It costs about $1.50 for an apple here. Not joking. And those are the cheap apples. You could spend $50 on a watermelon here. Sigh......just send those grapes for your rabbits over here.

11:08 PM  
Blogger Fantastagirl said...

Wait a frickin' minute - you spent $217 on groceries - and that's all you got??? If Mr. Incredible went to the store and spent that much money on groceries - lets just say I'd be blogging from jail. Food much be very expensive there.

11:29 PM  
Anonymous Kyle Korleski said...

How about regular Pepsi?

1:02 AM  
Blogger Mr. Fabulous said...

KQueen--Sounds like someone might need a care package...

Fantastagirl--I usually spend much less, I swear!

Kyle--Never! Pepsi is the devil's brew! But thanks for stopping by, heretic :)

5:40 AM  
Blogger Stacy The Peanut Queen said...

You autograph that sucker and sell it on E-Bay and you'll never have to work again! ;)

7:44 AM  
Blogger Motor City Monk said...

I'm just amazed at how you can respond to every single comment. I like NY Strips and filets better than Porterhouse.

8:05 AM  
Blogger Attila The Mom said...

Ha! All that did was make me want to send you MY receipts! ;-)

9:04 AM  
Blogger Mr. Fabulous said...

Stacy--Will you broker the sale for me?

Motor City Monk--It helps to have lots of free time and no life!

Attila--I jsut emailed you about them. I am IMPRESSED!

10:41 AM  
Blogger Janet said...

Wow. A waiting list to rent your blog? Impressive.

11:05 AM  
Blogger Lynda said...

I have too many posts to read to read 72 comments, but I thought $5.99 was awfully expensive for carrots, then I remembered you had rabbits. Are you saying the rabbits eat healthier than you do??

My husband thought it was funny. He looked over as I was browsing your list and said, "What's that?" Of course, then I had to read him some of your post. :)

12:14 PM  
Anonymous Luin said...

You know, if someone spent some time looking into it we could find out quite a bit on information about you from that reciept.

First of all, we can find your phone number. Gleaming subtle bits of information we have abut you. You live in the 352 area code, probably within the second three digits on the number.

You already tell us you live in Gainesville. You have a brand new red Hundai SUV.

OK, so Publix is located on 75. You must get up very early in the morning driving around Publix supermarket (Where saving is part of the pleasure. Ewe.) and in the early morning on Sundays (you buy a lot of food...probably a once a week ritual, allowing Mrs. Faboo time to sleep in) and there you are!

I'm so smart! And scary...

6:32 AM  
Blogger Suze said...

Mr Fab, I just need to know, what is be baby pea blend is. It has nothing to do with kids does it? LOL

11:13 AM  
Blogger SupComTabz said...

your fabulous!

2:54 PM  
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10:06 PM  
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10:21 PM  

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